Season 5 / Episode 8; Episode: "Lay
Down The Law"
The L Word Episode 508 - "Lay Down
I think Max's face may be on a milk carton somewhere. Along with my Typo
Previously on The L Word, things happened and oil was involved.
Showtime Presents, a scene from some action movie. Blahblahblah, Niki's
the action heroine, the manager and agent people love it, big premiere,
roll the intro!
The intro...you know the drill. And looooooooooooooooooove!!!
Shane and Jodi finish riding their bikes in the woods somewhere while
preparing for that charity ride thingy. Shane likes Molly...but then she
likes a lot of girls. Shane's been with, "tons," of straight
please, there are no straight girls in this Universe!!! Because straight
people are evil!!! EVIL!!! Or whatever. Ladies and gentlemen, I think
we're entering Self Destruction mode. Jodi wants to have a big group
dinner and Shane brings up inviting Tina and Sam. Oh, the charity ride
the Subaru Pink Ride. Get out! Stay out! Die!!!!!!
Kevin is angry about Niki being gay, as he goes off on Tina. Kevin also
apparently is a moron as he honestly thinks teenaged boys care if Niki's
gay or not. Look, if she's hot, that's all that's needed. But then maybe
they don't have any guys on their writing staff for this show. *shrug*
Kevin threatens to pull Niki from the film, but Tina comes up with an
to have Niki show up at the premiere of that action film and Paris Hilton
is brought up for the second episode in a row (the summoning, I suppose).
They're trying to figure out which guy to pair Niki up with when Greg
in. Kevin sees Greg (the guy playing Tim...er, Jim) and sees him as The
Military physical fitness center as Tasha and Gillian have a run-in.
short and brief and Tasha punches stuff. Lesbians are known for their
punching! Yeah, that's it!
Jenny talks with some girl about the tribulations of clothing and the
of the show, with Adele onhand. Tina arrives to talk with Jenny and Jenny
dismisses her, or at least tries to. Tina tries again and I get the sense
these two don't like each other. Again Tina is dismissed, but Tina won't
be denied a third time. Tina informs Jenny of what's happening with Niki
and the premiere. Jenny's not happy about this. Oh yeah, the movie's
called Liquid Heat. Which may or may not rank up there with Zombies On
Jenny goes to Niki's trailer and Niki's all weepy and sad and crying
she needs a hug and good God I need a beer. Jenny apparently hates
midgets. Kevin is there, after using the bathroom and Jenny's all
assertive. But Kevin stands up for himself. Good for him!!! Niki's
underaged, too...well, then. Wait, if she's underaged then what is she
doing making out with that guy in....headache...oh man, headache...
Lockerroom as Gillian checks out a naked female soldier. Love that
Shane deals with the straight girl playing Shawn (Shane). Remember, THERE
ARE NO STRAIGHT GIRLS!!! You're all GAY!!! GAY GAY GAY!!! All those
times I've heard idiots like James Dobson gripe about an agenda...it's
for me to defend against that when we have stuff like this happening.
Cracking knuckles onto the next scene...
Bette/Jodi talk at Jodi's while she prepares a Morocon meal for the big
dinner tonight. You think they would have learned by now. Bette's not
enthusiastic about Shane and Molly. She's REALLY not enthusiastic about
Tina and Sam showing up. Bette wonders aloud if Jodi ever thought about
getting Bette's permission. Jodi says no. She also says Bette doesn't
have to be there if she doesn't want to, causing Bette to reluctantly
Marvin Gaye music now as we ready for the big trial. Tasha puts on her
uniform. "What's Going On," seems appropo here as Gillian arrives
military courthouse or whatnot. Tasha arives. Alice eventually arrives
(looking all cute).
Alice goes to the waiting room and Gillian talks with her.
Onto the trial! Tasha may be gay and can't serve in the military. Yep,
sensible as it sounds, but it's based on the reality of Today's Military.
We get the defense side of things for the opening argument and then we
the prosecutory side from Gillian.
Meanwhile at the Planet, Kit and Shane talk with SheBar closed down for
time being. Shane gives the Tony Soprano shoutout (a return favor to The
Sopranos for mentioning, "that Jennifer Beals stuff. She a dyke in
life?" in that HBO show I never cared to watch).
Molly isn't happy with having a boyfriend while talking with Phyllis.
Phyllis doesn't want Molly to end up like Shane, but Molly winds up
defending Shane. I love these Mother-Daughter bonding moments. Molly
doesn't think Phyllis knows Shane. Well, Molly doesn't either. Molly
walks over to Shane, because now she's all rebellious. Once again, there
are no straight girls!!!! YOU'RE ALL GAY!!!!!
Speaking of gay, back to the trail as what's-her-name Martinez is asked
bunch of question by Curtis.
Bette arrives at Tina's trailer and she's not happy about Tina coming
dinner. Was their fling just a fling or a much bigger thing? Tina doesn't
want to be Candace. TOO LATE!!! Bette may want to break up with Jodi.
Bette thinks that she and Tina should stop their affair. Obviously that
won't happen, of course, but at least they said it.
And now Martinez is broken down as it turns out she was paranoid about
Tasha being gay (and it appears she knew all along that she was). If
Martinez was truly Army strong, she could have broken Gillian's questioning
down. But she didn't, because that would ruin the fun. Curtis objects,
but Tasha might be gay so it's overruled. Martinez isn't all that reliable
in the end.
Alice and Tasha talk during recess and Tasha isn't too happy about things.
Gillian says hi and Tasha walks away. Gillian informs Alice that they're
out of time, but they'll do it again tomorrow.
Onto the Liquid Heat premiere, kinda like Roll The Dice, but without
looking very Shane. Niki arrives with Greg and they it straight. Poor
Greg. Kevin sees Adele and Jenny walking towards them and Kevin doesn't
want Jenny there.
Jodi's place as Tina and Sam arrive. Bette uses the word, "masturbatory."
We're introduced to Amy and Melinda.
Jenny is banned from the theater and she doesn't like the guy keeping
out. Adele decides to walk in, leaving Jenny outside...y'know for the
of getting her in eventually. Adele poses for the camera....oh, she's
Back to the dinner party and Shane and Molly talk and everyone talks
there's talking. They step out for a cigarette and Bette has an idea where
this is going. Because it's Shane and THERE ARE NO STRAIGHT GIRLS in this
Universe. But there are straight men...and they're all apparently jerks.
*insert laughter here*
More talking as Amy asks Bette about Jodi cooking Indian food. Tina brings
up Bette not being into Indian food 'cause it makes her sick and we get
little silent tension.
Molly and Shane talk and unless you're new to the show (and even if you
are), you know where this is going. They smoke and talk and Shane uses
some reverse psychology to get what she wants...which she gets, because
(say it with me), there are no straight girls in this Universe. They kiss
and then Molly feels all dirty afterwards. And there ya go.
Straight people and bi's are also quite wishy washy in this Universe.
it balances out by the lesbians being less than stable. So I guess it's
all good, because everyone's screwed up here.
Adele's having fun as she mingles with the important people. She has
offiically gone from Faithful Minion to Evil Genius. Jenny is told to
Bette/Tina have some alone time in Jodi's house with Jodi, Amy/Melina
Sam all up on the roof and Shane and Molly are gone. Dan Foxworthy is
brought up by Bette which is remarkable as the affair addicted couple
close. Sam and Amy and Melinda all arrive to spoil the party.
The premiere's over with with Niki and Greg engaging in a heterosexul
Oh, the scandal. Jenny's not happy and now she's all weepy as Adele
arrives and tries to console her a bit over what just happened.
The next day as we get OurChart pimpage in the trial. Major Durow answers
questions about the site after his thorough research. Curtis cross
examines very simple. Is Tasha on the site? Nope? No more questions.
Good job, Curtis.
Alice is called to the stand. So Alice is on The Look. She's known Tasha
for maybe a year. Don't even get me started on the Timeline at this point.
More questions and stuff and we get to the sexual relations question,
prompting Alice to ignore the question with a well timed rant. Alice could
say that Gillian's a lesbian and breaks down Gillian with a smile.
For the first time this year, I'm actually proud of little ol' Al.
Back to the waiting room as Gillian arrives upset. Gillian doesn't wanna
be followed (because she's a closet case it appears). Gillian makes a
with Alice for Tasha to play it safe on the stand and everything'll be
okay, so long as Gillian doesn't have to watch her back or deal with Alice.
My, what a flake.
Alice tells Tasha that all she has to do is dismiss Pvt. Brown's
accusations and be all, "he was jealous," and stuff and she'll
with being gay.
So with victory in grasp, Tasha is on the stand. After her questions
Curtis, she gets the obligatory questions about Brown. Time to snatch
Defeat from the jaws of Victory as Tasha outs herself, because she no
longer believes in the military code. But there's a nice irony that's
pointed out here as the military with its War On Terror and invasion of
other countries is indeed strained for troops...only to feel the need
get rid of some of them if they're gay. And that, my friends is the moral
of this story as Tasha declares her love for Alice.
Alice is leaving and Tasha catches up to her. She says she won, but
quitting or getting kicked out of the military. It's never really said
she leaves...does she quit? Is it a discharge or a dishonorable discharge
or what? Gillian defends her closeted life by maintaining that the code
more important to her. Alice/Tasha make out in front of the troops and
that's our show.
Four episodes left. Now what?
the episode and share your thoughts on the rest of Season 5!
Malaya Rivera Drew
1 Recap Elizabeth Ziff
2 Teaser Elizabeth Ziff
3 Main Title BETTY
4 The Blister Exits Slipknot
5 Jenny & Nikki Elizabeth Ziff
6 Underworld BETTY
7 What's Going On Marvin Gaye
8 Court Transition Elizabeth Ziff
9 I'm A Lover The Staple Singers
10 Transition 2 Elizabeth Ziff
11 Martinez Transition Elizabeth Ziff
12 Liquid Heat Elizabeth Ziff
13 Maresia Monica Freire
14 Liquid Heat 2 Elizabeth Ziff
15 Mii Elizabeth Ziff
16 B-A-B-Y The Brunetteas
17 Broke In Two Sandra Cross
18 Liquid Heat 3 Elizabeth Ziff
19 Transition 3 Elizabeth Ziff
21 Alice Figures it out Elizabeth Ziff
22 Alice Figures it out 2 Elizabeth Ziff
23 Little By Little Dusty Springfield
THE L WORD 508: "Liquid Heat"
Amidst a scorching heat wave in Los Angeles, Jenny finds her own temperature
rising on the set of Lez Girls. After a quick dip in the pool, Jodi does
her best to cool things off with Bette but is quickly turned away as Bette
would rather brave the heat with Tina than with Jodi. Shane convinces
Jenny to accompany her to a mafia-inspired sit down hosted by the women
of SheBar, Dawn Denbo and her lover Cindi.
Directed By: Rose Troche
Written By: Ilene Chaiken
Special Guest Star: Cybill Shepherd
Guest Stars: Malaya Rivera Drew, Jane Lynch, Alicia Leigh Willis, Elizabeth
Keener, Kate French, Clementine Ford