Season 4 / Episode 5; Episode: "Lez
Girls "
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Episode
Summary 405
Kace Evers Episode Review Of Mass Destruction
#405: Lez Girls
I like how things are building here. I just hope the payoff's as good.
Previously on The L Word, we met Paige. We played basketball. Shane
needed money. Helena's now a caterer. We were introduced to Jodie and
Tom.
Jenny's game of deception got into gear. We met Hazel. We said buh-bye
to
Brooke (which saddens me greatly).
Showtime presents hars reality as Max looks in the mirror and takes off
his
clothes. All of them. He is still pretty much she and the reality is
sobering to him.
We get the opening montage and well, the Dana fans are gonna be pissed,
I
just know it. Tasha's riding the motorcycle with Alice on the back. Yep,
prepare for pissed offedness to the highest point of pissitivity from
the
Angry Dana Fans. Tasha finally turns around while standing beside Papi
and
the evolution appears complete.
Angus brings Angelica and her afro in to Hazel who's babysitting. Angus
had a sucky day. Again, Angus...no time to help your friend Tina shall
come back to bite ya.
Bette says hi to Tom, who hits on a guy. Jodie talks with Bette asking
about her and Nadya. See, word gets around. Sometimes Jodies talks, other
times she uses sign language. Jodie apparently got it on with a graduate
student back in the day. "Don't be careful," says Jodie. Not
that Bette
needed that advice in Season 1.
Sounder the used dog is dying and is about to be put to sleep as
Jenny...er...Debbie looks on. It pains Lindsay to do this. In terms of
masking discontent, Tonya can't hold a candle to Jenny here. Lindsay has
no idea what's happening and for a moment Jenny almost feels bad. Lindsay
asks "Debbie" out to dinner (a friendly one) in an effort to
cheer up her
new friend.
Angus teaches Hazel how to play. Hazel is so obvious here in her
intentions that Angus is pretty much destroying himself here. Aaaand they
kiss and begin to do other things. Well, Angus I know you're hurtin' and
all, but you're pretty much bringing this pain on yourself. Deep down,
I'm
sure he's wishing he had been willing to help out Tina now. Hazel has
no
ass.
At the Planet as Kit and Shane go over Kit/Angus's duet in front of Shay.
Papi arrives and once again tries to instigates the feud. Seriously,
someone bring up Carmen. Papi backs off at the behest of Kit.
Alice and Phyllis return as we get the nice little dig at guys, which
for
some is deservedly so, 'cause some guys really are dumb enough to think
they're a necessary component when seeing two women together. Either that
or it's just high ambition, which is probably just as true. It's the kind
of mindset that would make a guy hit on Melissa Etheridge. Alice wants
to
check on Helena and Helena's cooking for the party tonight at Phyllis.
Lara could have done this easy and in her sleep...and without need of
an
assistant, who is lyingly out sick. Alice and Phyllis venture to the
bedroom. Phyllis brings Alice a gift and it's The Whole Lesbian Sex Book.
Wow, they still sell that? Nice. Phyllis wants to really let loose.
"Yes! Let's experiment!" That's the mating call of love right
there. In
the midst of all this, there's a husband out there who doesn't even know,
which kinda brings a downer to the whole thing...although I'm probably
the
only one thinking of that right now. Remember, this is supposed to be
a
return to Season 1 and during Season 1, nobody seemed to concerned about
Tim, either.
Lindsay and Jen...er...Debbie eat. "Debbie" tries to get Lindsay
to come
out about something bad form childhood and Lindsay doesn't wanna feel
vulnerable. So now Jenny wants to go for the kill. Lindsay admits an
attraction, but has a girlfriend so it's a no go. "Debbie" probably
likes
that Lindsay and Stacy are having problems, which plays well to her game
of
deception. Stacy and Lindsay apparently lives apart from one another.
The
good news is that this relationship at least destroys the whole, "moving
van on the 2nd date," or whatever joke more or less. Lindsay wants
to get
to know "Debbie" better and "Debbie" is studying the
manatees. Paging Gene
Feinberg...
Hammerin' Henry and Tina argue about God Knows What that was probably
cut
out of the final version of this episode as they make their way back home.
They see Angus and Hazel playing together on the front porch. Henry/Tina
hide in the bushes and Tina comes up with a sound plan. "She is so
fired."
Shay reads comics as Bette says hi to Shane. Bette flips through The
New
Yorker and Jenny now has an article. Okay, then...
Max prepares his letter of resignation and the boss walks in. I guess
Brooke didn't tell her Dad the reasoning behind the split, so Max is off
the hook. For now. The letter of resignation is done away with.
Paige's house as Shane and Shay arrive for the play date. Did I miss
something? When the Hell were they scheduled like business meetings?
Anyway, Shay and Jared play video games and Paige invites Shane in.
Bette goes to a restaurant named Toast to have dinner with Bette. Tina
tells Bette about Angus/Hazel. Tina almost has her Season 1 look back.
We
get Bette/Tina hints here as they order the same thing and say the same
words at the same time. Priceless. Bette thinks they should stay out of
it. Tina speaks form experience about being hurt and Bette takes
exception. Tina takes exception to Bette being Alpha again and well, this
is gonna get ugly.
Alice is pissed at Jenny as she reads excerpts of Lez Girls (thus the
episode name) to Helena. The names are veiled at best, but the
descriptions are pretty much spot-on, but with a negative spin. The masked
names are rather pathetic. "Power Dyke," is the term of the
week. Jenny's
unjustified hatred for Tina spills out in the article as well.
Paige and Shane get to know each other while Shay and Jared play. Paige
works as a bartender part time and does telemarketing from home. Jared's
father is brought up as the non-responsible type. Shane's ears stick out
kinda like an elf's here. Paige was hoping Shane was hitting on her and
there's an uncomfortable moment.
Phyllis's house now as we're introduced to HOLY CRAP, the Senator from
X-Men!!! No wonder Nightcrawler got outta town last year!!! Anyway, it's
Leonard Kroll, Phyllis's husband, who doesn't suspect a thing. Well, he
seems like a nice guy.
Phyllis talks to Alice on the phone and she loves her. Hoohhhh boy.
Alice arrives at Jenny's and says hi to Shane. Alice takes exception
to
Jenny's Lez Girls article as Max looks on. Jenny claims it's all fiction,
but Alice calls bullshit and rightfully so. Jenny tries to explain
herself, but it just ain't working. This scene is too funny for words,
but
I'll try anyway. Jenny tries to channel the spirit of Monet. Jenny tries
to put herself on the same level as Monet? HA!!! Alice then channels
Monet and wins that argument. God, that was hilarious and worthy of a
replay.
Jodie's at Phyllis's party and talks with some guys who are of no
consequence. Why are all the guys on this show fucking creepy this year???
Except for Leonard, but I guess we should give him time. Bette and Jodie
have a playful battle of wits as they get to know each other better, with
Tom providing translation. These two have incredible chemistry together.
If I get onboard the Bette/Jodie 'ship, will the TiBetters try and burn
my
house down? Well, if it's still standing after the whole Candace Army
thing, I guess I'm safe.
Alice and Jenny continue arguing at a bar and Jenny's wrong here. Papi
arrives and we're introduced to Tasha. Tasha appears to be pissed off.
Alice checks her out and Tasha goes off for a smoke break.
Bette, Jodie and Tom go outside and get stoned.
Shane works her magic without having to do a thing, without really meaning
to and that's difference between Shane and Papi. Shane doesn't have to
put
forth the effort. Some girl says hi to Shane. Her name is Ruby and here
comes Papi. Shane's just halfhearted here and it's Papi to the rescue.
Papi tries hard and wins as Shane looks on, not really caring. Season
1
Shane takes Ruby and makes Papi watch...then breaks them both. Why?
'Cause that's how Season 1 Shane was.
Elsewhere at the club, Stacy and Lindsay dance together. Jenny sees them.
Stacy sees Jenny, then Lindsay sees "Debbie." Jenny needs to
hide and does
it by making Alice kiss her. Shit, does this mean Alice is gonna wind
up
off the show soon now? NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Back at Phyllis's get together. Helena's trying to downplay her situation
to the idiot guy. She's summoned to the kitchen and we get a disaster
in
the kitchen. It just gets worse for Helena. Poor dear.
Tasha enjoys her smoke break by drinking a beer. Man, War is Hell. Alice
says hi in effort to get to know her. Tasha is rather cold, but Alice
warms her up a little. Alice wasn't kidding about the whole exploring
thing. Alice, along with being a lesbian vampire freeeeeeeeeeeeeak is
now
into motorcycles. Angry Dana Fans all grimmace together. Tasha smiles!
Alice gets an emergency call from Helena.
Helena needs to Alice to help her out in getting some stuff for the party.
Bette, Jodie and Tom continue getting high outside and away from everyone.
Is it just me or did Kit and Tina suddenly disappear from the show?
Leonard wants Helena to cater up in Stanford, but Phyllis wants Helena
to
stay. Alice says hi and meets the man whose wife she's been fucking and
suddenly gets a guilt conscience. Well, took long enough. Phyllis feels
uncomfortable as we're shown a really bad photoshopped picture of the
Kroll
Family. Leonard has no idea. I'm just hoping Magneto doesn't show up,
but
that's just me.
Bette, Jodie and Tom continue getting high and talking about small penises.
I think the lesson learned from Season 4 is that straight guys just suck.
Well, thank God I'm uh...wow, look at the time.
Bette almost kisses Jodie, but it's interrupted by Alice and Phyllis
breaking up. Alice realizes that she's been a little selfish. Phyllis
doesn't think she's gonna hurt anybody. What a fucking moron.
Sobering note to end the episode on, but things are continuing to build
nicely.
Discussion
Board -- What did you think of the episode??
Guest
Stars:
Kristanna Loken
Steven Eckholdt
Heather Matarazzo
Bruce Davison
Music
A big thanks to EzGirl and Howard Parr, the Season 4 Music Editor!
Visit EzGirl at www.myspace.com/ezgirlmusic
1-Recap--ezgirl
2- Main Title-- BETTY
3- Sounder Dying-- ezgirl
4- Paralyzed-- Betty Wright
5- 'Tain't Nobody's Buszness If I Do"Mary Stallings
6- Analingus-- ezgirl
7- Bring It Back-- Alyssa Pridham
8- Tina & Henry in The Bushes-- ezgirl
9- Max Relived-- ezgirl
10- Crossing the Street-- ezgirl
11- Blues by Five--Miles Davis
12- Runaway--Lazy
13- You Ain't Gotta Lie-- De La Cruz
14- Heavy--Jennifer Johns
15- Everything Is…--Tiggarah
16- Shooting Star--Les Baxter
17-- Tick Tock--Mz. Fontaine
18- Way Out-- Lazy
19- Daylight-- Lazy
20- Tender Love (END SONG)-- Jill Sobule
Previews
of Episode 4.05, Luck Be a Lady
A busy Bette begins a new romance, butts heads with Tina over Angelica's
pre-school, and has to deal with Alice's breakup with Phyllis; Papi gives
poker lessons; Jenny escalates the plan to break up Stacey and Lindsey.
SPOILER VERSION:
Shane finds out she totally underestimated the impact and coverage of
her underwear modeling as billboards and merchandise hits the street and
stores. After all the glitz and glamour of the premiere, Shane finds herself
at Paige's table eating meat loaf and feeling relieved.
Bette tries to hold her art program together as Phyllis lashes out at
everyone after Alice calls it quite with her.
Shane's Russian Roulette film premiere gets out of control as the phone
tree grows to unimaginable proportions as all the girls scramble to get
invited.
Papi shows up with her crew to teach Helena, Alice, and Shane poker and
shares the cardinal rules of the game with the trio.
Papi's friend Tasha (Rose Rollins) shows up at Alice's and punches Alice
unintentionally, the result of a flashback to action in Iraq.
Just as Alice warms up to Tasha, a heartbroken and relentless Phyllis
shows up on her doorstep.
As Bette realizes that Jodi's seemingly fearlessness is the place she
needs to explore, Bette approaches Jodie and loses herself in a new experience
only to find out Jodi has certain likes and dislikes.
Max advises a female co-worker to sue for sexual discrimination over
being passed over for a job promotion.
Tina and Bette butt heads when it comes to registering Angelica for pre-school.
In order to put the final nail into the relationship with Stacey and
Lindsay, Jenny disguises herself as a big time magazine editor and gives
Stacey the story of interviewing Shane at the film premiere. Problem is
the magazine already has assigned a writer and Stacey is hauled off the
red carpet as Jenny scoops up to Santa Barbara to see Lindsay.
Helena tries her hand at lady luck and antes up to a high-stakes poker
game.
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